|Written by Sushilove51| Photo by T. Gouw |
“We’re becoming mortal. It’s us, being close to each other. It never happened this fast before. You have to leave. The further you get from me, the better you’re going to feel”
– Charlize Theron, Hancock Movie
Thousands of people walk to and from the Haneda-Airport. Some on time moving according to schedule and some are in a rush barely making it. Just like the McAllister family in the Home Alone movie.
Everyone has a journey and sometimes I wonder how nice it’d be if everyone would just stopped what they were doing and enjoyed life with each other. One of the tragic things about time on earth, is that our time is limited. Each of us are giving an unknown amount. With this in perspective, I hope to make an effort doing things I enjoy with the people I care for.
This day helped me realized this truth. Considering the circumstance.
Depending on what brings you to airport changes your entire body language. For instance, If you are going to see someone you love. You are all smiles you walk around like your at Disneyland, “The happiest place on earth”. Nothing will take you of this high.
But if you’re leaving someone behind it can be sadder than a cemetery visit. Which happened to be the case for me.
I didn’t want to fly. I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t care to travel. Even though, I’ve always considered myself a traveler. I used to want to see the world. Part of the reason I joined the military in the first place. I knew I’d be given the chance to see parts to the world I’ve wanted to go.
My second year in; I’ve traveled throughout the U.S., Mid-west, East Coast, and I was able to have great experiences like drinking a Pint of Guinness fresh from the tap at an Ireland pub. Speaking to people I barely understood. Only making out that there were giving off some good vibes. I met Jesus in Brazil as a statue called “Christ the Redeemer” who welcomed me with his arms spread open.
Then it all changed. The Traveling adventurer side of me disappeared. When I got stationed to Japan. All of a sudden I no longer felt the need to travel after I looked around, settled in and saw where I was at.
I realized a truth about myself. When I was traveling I must of not been doing it aimlessly like I thought I was. The curiosity I felt when I stepped of different airports and the happiness I felt when I looked around. Taking in all the new decor and the smiles from the friendly host. The curiosity was there because I was looking for something. Not sure what it was exactly but perhaps home.
While in Japan I felt a comfort I never knew. That’s when I had the epiphany and I see it more clear. I wasn’t traveling just to travel. I needed to find something. And that’s what happened when I moved to Japan. The perfect location and the person.
For the past two years me and here spent all our free time with each other. I was a busy young man serving in the Military. The training. The exercising. The war games. Still we made time for each other. This made the entire work cycle worth every minute. I would do it again. As long as I knew sometime during the week we would eventually get back to each other.
Imagine how I felt when we were at the airport knowing that I had to go to the Middle East for a year. It’s very cliché to say but we have to take the good with the bad. When we look at the situation at face value it was sad. She cried the whole way there up until we said goodbye. But then I got to see her cry. Which says a lot more than what anyone can express with words.
Watching her demeanor was bitter sweet. You know the military was easy for me. I may have gotten PTSD before I even joined. The environment I was raised in forced me to control my emotion, even withdraw because if I succumbed to the feeling that were necessary for the situation. I’m sure I would have cried my entire child hood.
Years later, I’m at an airport. It’s okay to be vulnerable because she is. She doesn’t care how she looks. All she cares about is that she wants me to come back safe. That’s up in the air it’s a mystery. Anything can happen in the Middle East. But, nothing is more dishonorable than a man who doesn’t fulfill his obligation. The military provided me with a chance to be better. Now it was time to fulfill my side of the deal.
Airports can the saddest/romantic places on earth. I needed a cigarette.